FORTUNE  3'2m0f A slave girl/fortune teller stalks Paul

PAUL -- Come on, Timothy, we're going to be late for the 

TIM --- I'm coming, Paul. I'm coming. Just a second.

PAUL -- (pause) Your hair looks fine. Now put the comb down and 
let's go!

TIM --- Chill out, Paul, maybe you're over the hill. But, if I 
meet a girl on the way, I want to look good.

PAUL -- We're going to synagogue, Timothy, not to a dance.

TIM --- Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm done. I'm done. And I am looking 
good. Let's go.

(door open, door close)

Are are you going to preach to the people at the synagogue 
today, Paul?

PAUL -- Of course. You know I always...

TIM --- (whispers) Oh! There she is again!

PAUL -- Who?

TIM --- (whispers) Don't turn around! 

PAUL -- What do you mean, don't turn around? First you say there 
she is again and then you won't let me see who your...

TIM --- She's the girl who's been following us for the last 
few days.

PAUL -- Oh, her.

TIM --- Yeah. I think she likes me.

PAUL -- I'm sure.

TIM --- No, really. Every time I look back she's looking at me. 
It's a good thing I spent a little extra time on my hair, huh?

PAUL -- She's definitely your type.

TIM --- What do you mean by that?

PAUL -- She's a fortune teller.

TIM --- You mean, she's a prophet, don't you? Wo, baby! My kind 
of woman! Good looking and she can foretell the future.

PAUL -- Timothy, she's not a prophet. She's a common fortune 

TIM --- She doesn't look so common to me. Look at the way she 
she wiggles when she walks.

PAUL -- She's a slave girl. Her owners make a fortune off of 
her fortune telling.

TIM --- All that and rich too? You go on ahead. I'm going to tie 
my shoe until she catches up to me.

PAUL -- Oh, no you're not. 

TIM --- You're always such a party pooper.

PAUL -- Timothy, I said that her owners are rich. She just a 
slave girl. She penniless.

TIM --- Oh. (pause) But she IS good looking and she is a 

PAUL -- Fortune teller.

TIM --- Fortune teller. Big difference.

PAUL -- Well, there is a rather large difference.

TIM --- Yeah, I know. A fortune teller makes a fortune while a 
prophet makes no prophet. (laughs)

PAUL -- That wasn't quite what I had in mind.

TIM --- Okay, what's the difference between a fortune teller and 
a prophet?

PAUL -- She gets her prophecies from SATAN.

TIM --- Oh. 

PAUL -- Yeah, she's demon possessed.

TIM --- Oh. And she doesn't have any money?

PAUL -- Poor as a church mouse.

TIM --- Oh. 

PAUL -- Yeah, oh. So, why are you looking back at her?

TIM --- I guess she's not all that good looking after all.

PAUL -- No?

TIM --- Nope. So, she must have been looking at you. (afar) Oh, 
look at those two gorgeous women up ahead. I'll meet you at the 
synagogue, Paul.

PAUL -- (fading) Yes, going to synagogue is such a spiritual 

�2013 Bob Snook. Conditions for use:
Do not sell any part of this script, even if you rewrite it.
Pay no royalties, even if you make money from performances.
You may reproduce and distribute this script freely,
but all copies must contain this copyright statement.  email: [email protected]