SORCERER 4'4m1f Philip teaches Simon the sorcerer real magic

SIMON -- (slick radio announcer) Hi! My name is Simon. And I'm 
the world's greatest sorcerer! Pick a card.

PHILIP - No, thank you.

SIMON -- (softly) Listen, fella, I've got the crowd spellbound 
here. Pick a card.

PHILIP - No, thank you. Choose somebody else.

SIMON -- Hi! My name is Simon. And I'm the world's greatest 
sorcerer! Pick a card. 

JIM ---- I can't.

SIMON -- Look fella, I got a crowd of people here who came to 
watch the world's greatest sorcerer. Don't tell me you can't. 
Pick a card!

JIM ---- I can't. I have arthritis. My hands are all gnarled. 

SIMON -- Oh, wow. Those are really gnarled. Okay, how about you 
fella. Can you pick a card?

FRED --- Sure. Where is it?

SIMON -- Right here.

FRED --- Right where.

SIMON -- Right here! What's the matter, fella, are you blind?!

FRED --- Yes.

SIMON -- Say, listen fella, I didn't know. How about you, lady? 
Pick a card for Simon, the world's greatest sorcerer?

GLADYS - I'm sorry. I'm really not feeling well.

SIMON -- Mama said there'd be days like this. Alright, I'm 
losing my crowd here. Back to you, fella. Your hands don't look 
gnarled and you're not blind. What's your excuse?

PHILIP - I don't have an excuse.

SIMON -- Then, pick a card.... Please? 

PHILIP - No, thank you.

SIMON -- Look, I'm losing my crowd here. Help me out, huh?

PHILIP - I'd rather help him.

SIMON -- Him. You mean, the crippled guy with the gnarled hands.

PHILIP - Yes. (beat) Sir, do you believe in the name of Jesus?

JIM ---- Yes, but I couldn't get near him to have him heal me 
before he died. 

PHILIP - Did you know that Jesus rose from the dead?

JIM ---- No! I didn't! Did he really?!

SIMON -- Hey, hey. I've got a magic show going here. Are you 
going to pick a card or aren't you?

PHILIP - No. (aloud) In the name of Jesus be healed.

JIM ---- (gasps) Look! My hands are healed. Look everybody! My 
I can move my fingers! Praise the Lord! Thank you, Jesus!

SIMON -- (shouts) My name is Simon. And I'm the world's greatest 
sorcerer! (aside) This is my crowd, buddy. Get your own crowd. 

PHILIP - I'm sorry. I didn't mean to rain on your parade.

SIMON -- Okay, so, for my next trick, I will tuck this blue 
scarf into my fist and.... 

FRED --- I can see! I can see!

SIMON -- Hey, fella, what are you doing now?

PHILIP - I'm sorry, Simon, but this man was blind and he  
couldn't see the color of your scarf. So, I....

FRED --- I can see! I can see! The scarf is blue!

SIMON -- (aside) That's really a low down thing to do fella, 
stealing another man's audience.

PHILIP - I'm sorry. Please continue.

SIMON -- (aside) Right. I'm supposed to change the color of a 
scarf after you upstage me and heal a blind man? (aloud) 
Alright, my name is Simon. And I'm the world's greatest 
sorcerer! Please look inside the hat. As you can see, there is 
nothing in the hat. Now, I wave my magic wand over the.... 

GLADYS - I'm alive! I'm alive!

SIMON -- What are you doing now, fella.

PHILIP - I'm sorry. But this lady just collapsed and died of a 
heart attack right here in front of me. It's not like I planned 
to interrupt your magic act.

SIMON -- Alright, fella, who are you?

PHILIP - My name is Philip. I'm an apostle of Jesus Christ.

SIMON -- Alright, if you can't fight 'em, join 'em. How do I do 
magic like you do?

PHILIP - I didn't do it. Jesus did it.

SIMON -- Okay, what do I have to do to tap into that?

PHILIP - You have to admit how bad you are and turn from your 
wicked ways.

SIMON -- I'm not bad. I'm the world's greatest sorcerer.

PHILIP - Sorry. No repentance, no salvation.

SIMON -- I'm not so bad.

PHILIP - (fading) See ya, later.

SIMON -- (fading) I'll tell you how I do the card trick.

PHILIP - (afar) Sorry.

SIMON -- (afar) I'll tell you how I change the color of the 

PHILIP - (afar) Sorry

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