INN      3'2m?f A phone reservation for the virgin birth

(Bo and Joe stand at opposite end of the stage with phones to 
their ears)

BO --- Holiday Inn of Bethlehem, good evening.

JOE -- Ah, hi, we're coming to Bethlehem for the census. How far 
are you from the census office?

BO --- We're just a hop skip and a jump away, if you strap your 
sandals tight. (Chuckles)

JOE -- Yes, well, I suppose we should stay there then, but we 
don't have a lot of money. Do you have any economy rooms?

BO --- How many in your party, sir?

JOE -- There'll be two of us. But she's going to have a baby. We 
may need a crib.

BO --- Babies always stay free of charge here at Holiday Inn of 
Bethlehem. You can just ask for a crib when you check in if you 
need one.

JOE -- Oh, thank you. You're very kind.

BO --- Not at all. Let's see that's a double...we'll put you on 
the first floor so there's no stairs for your wife to climb.

JOE -- Oh, that's very thoughtful, but I must tell you she's not 
my wife.

BO --- She's not your wife?

JOE -- No.

BO --- Oh.

JOE -- Do you need my Visa Card number?

BO --- You're not married?

JOE -- Yes. No.

BO --- Well, are you married to this poor girl or not?

JOE -- Yes. No. What I mean is we'll be married by the time we 
leave for Bethlehem.

BO --- Well, congratulations. You're doing the right thing, sir.

JOE -- The right thing. Oh, no. You don't understand. See, it's 
not my baby. 

BO --- Yes, sir, I am sure... Let's see we have a double room...

JOE -- You don't understand. It really isn't my baby.

BO --- Then why are marrying this bimbo?

JOE -- Oh, she's not a bimbo. She's carrying the messiah.

BO --- She must be very proud.

JOE --  You don't believe me.

BO --- Well, I usually get stories like this from people wanting 
to rent a room for one hour. Your story is truly refreshing.

JOE -- No, really, I'm telling the truth. The angel of the Lord 
came to her and asked her if she wanted to give birth to the 
messiah. She happily agreed. 

BO --- You know, I've never heard that one before.

JOE -- Well, you may not believe it but it's true.

BO --- And you? Why are you involved with this... with this...

JOE -- Virgin. She's a virgin.

BO --- Sure. Why not. But, if the baby is not yours, why are you 
going to marry the

JOE -- The teachers of the law were going to stone her to death.

BO --- That really makes a strong case for the messiah theory 
doesn't it.

JOE -- I must admit that if the baby turns out to be the messiah 
I was hoping...

BO --- That your name would appear in the first book of the new 

JOE -- How did you know?

BO --- I got caught up in the creativity.

JOE -- Now, how much is the room?

BO --- Oh, what a shame. The computer says all the rooms are 

JOE --  There's no room in the inn?

BO --- There's no room in the Holiday Inn, sir. You may have to 
stay in the barn, but the messiah will need a STABLE home. Tah, 

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