SERVANT  5'1m*f RT: Jesus heals the centurion's servant

(RT == Readers' Theater: requires little or no memorization,
little or no rehearsal. An indefinite number of reporters are
salted throughout the audience.)

CENTURION -- (enters wearing leather skirt, armor, helmet and
sandals, points to audience) Who are you people? What do you
want? This is private property, you know.

REPORTER -- We're newspaper reporters. We would like to ask you
a few questions.

CENTURION -- If you're thinking of putting my name in print,
forget it. Roman soldiers don't get involved in public affairs.
Go away. (turns)

REPORTER -- What if we agree not to use your name?

REPORTER -- Yes, what if we agree to refer to you as a "Roman
Centurion from Capernaum".

CENTURION -- (turns) Sorry, that doesn't work for me. I'm the
only centurion in Capernaum. That's not very anonymous.

REPORTER -- What if we agree to refer to you as a "Roman
Centurion" period. We'll leave out the geographic description

CENTURION -- (sighs) Why do you want to interview me anyway? I'm
just a soldier.

REPORTER -- Is it true that Jesus of Nazareth healed your

CENTURION -- No names and no geographical references. Agreed?

ALL -- Agreed.

CENTURION -- Then, yes. It's true that Jesus healed my servant.

REPORTER -- What was he suffering from?

CENTURION -- I'm not sure, actually. He was completely paralyzed
and he was in extreme pain.

REPORTER -- And Jesus healed him completely?


REPORTER -- What incantation did Jesus use?

CENTURION -- Excuse me?

REPORTER -- What ritual did Jesus perform... what prayer did he

CENTURION -- I don't know. Listen, my servant is inside. He
knows as much about this miracle as I do. Why don't you ask him?

REPORTER -- The story would have more credibility if it came
from a Roman Centurion than from a slave.

REPORTER -- Can't you just tell us what he said?

CENTURION -- (turns) No. I never saw Jesus. And he never came
within shouting distance.

REPORTER -- Weren't you with your servant when Jesus healed him?

CENTURION -- Yes. I was.

REPORTER -- Then, you MUST have seen the ritual and heard the

CENTURION -- No. Jesus never came into the house with us.

REPORTER -- You mean Jesus healed this paralyzed man without
even seeing him?

CENTURION -- That's right.

REPORTER -- This is fantastic!

REPORTER -- How did Jesus even know that your servant was

CENTURION -- I heard that Jesus was in town and I sent another
servant to ask him if he would heal him.

REPORTER -- And Jesus healed your servant's paralysis?

CENTURION -- And his pain.

REPORTER -- Without even laying eyes on him?

CENTURION -- That's right.

REPORTER -- This is fantastic!

REPORTER -- Jesus has never healed anyone like this before. He's
always laid hands on them or put mud on them or spit or

CENTURION -- He may have used some prayer or incantation but I
didn't see it.

REPORTER -- Are you aware that this is the first time Jesus has
ever healed a non-Jew?

CENTURION -- Yes. I've followed Jesus' ministry closely since it
started down by the Jordan River. This is the first time he
healed a gentile.

REPORTER -- How do you explain this.

CENTURION -- Explain what? The healing part or the gentile part?


REPORTER -- Jesus has said repeatedly that he came to preach the
good news to the Jews. Why would he sidetrack himself to help a

CENTURION -- Because I asked him to.

REPORTER -- Did you coerce him, bribe him, what?

CENTURION -- I asked him. Jesus is not just the savior of the
Jews, he's the savior of the world. He has limited his preaching
to the Jews because they are his chosen people. He'll preach to
them first, then, use the Jews to preach his message to the rest
of the world. This may have been the first non-Jew that Jesus
heals, but it won't be the last. I'm confident that anyone who
asks Jesus for healing and truly believes in him will be healed.

REPORTER -- So, you expect Jesus to heal other gentiles as well?

CENTURION -- Of course. All they have to do is ask.

REPORTER -- Let's talk about the HEALING part. How do you think
Jesus healed your servant?


REPORTER -- Yes. Was it magic, the power of suggestion, what?

CENTURION -- Jesus is God. He created the universe. After
creating the universe out of nothing, healing one paralysis is
trivial by comparison.

REPORTER -- Are you saying that Jesus is God, the creator of the

CENTURION -- Who else could the messiah of Israel be?!

REPORTER -- The messiah is just supposed to be a savior.

CENTURION -- Well, if you read the scriptures of the Jews as I
have, you'll see that God himself declares that there is no
savior but God himself. Anyone less than God can't possibly be
the messiah.

Now, go away and leave us alone. (points) And no names and no
geographic locations. Got it? (exits)

ALL -- Got it.

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